Are They Tryin' To Kill Me?

So about 10 minutes ago I decided to log into my bank website just to check things out (i.e. put off sleep for another 15 minutes or so) and OH MY FREAKING GOD it was all jacked up. The statement showed that the account had been overdrawn on and off for the last two months and I seriously freaked the fuck out! I was just in there a week ago and everything was absolutely fine, didn't show any of this (and for the record, I think my account has been overdrawn like twice in the 8 years that I've had it and never by more than like $20... this was talking like $300 & showing that my car payment hadn't come out yet). Anyway, so I work myself into a heart pounding bitch-fit and look the thing over, staring the clock down waiting for it to be time for the bank to open so I can figure out what the hell is going on. Then, I sign out of the account because I am damn near hyperventilating and can't stand to look at it anymore. For whatever reason I decided to log back in almost immediately (seriously like 45 seconds later) and everything was FINE!!!! It was like everything had been a bad hallucination. I did notice that some things were shown as processed instead of in progress so maybe I just logged in while they were doing the withdrawals and deposits on my particular account and it was jacked up for that moment. But FREAKIN' A, don't these people know that I just quit smoking YESTERDAY! Don't they know my heart is under ENOUGH strain today.... I don't freakin' need this shit today! It's a conspiracy, they're tryin' to kill me. If you'll excuse me now, I'm off in search of the nearest defibrillator to jump start my heart again.